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SECTION 1, Continued:

God Is Great, Beer Is Good, and People Are Crazy

6. Why do people back up into parking spaces?

First, because it’s safer to pull forward out of a space than to back and fill to get out. The newer model cars with their dwarfish windows and bloated supports have huge blind spots. A mother with a pair of twins in a stroller could walk behind you and you wouldn’t see them. And no, you couldn’t see her on the useless back-up camera if you had your sunglasses on, because you can’t see the screen through polarized lenses.

Second, because it’s far, far less aggravating to pull forward when somebody’s gigantic SUV or King-Kong-sized pickup is parked next to you than it is to try to back out around the thing. Here, too, it’s much safer: you’re more likely to spot someone coming up the aisle because you’re eight or ten feet closer than you would be if you parked nose-end first.

Third, because you’re less likely to dent your neighbor’s vehicle if you’re pulling forward than if you’re dorking around with backing and filling.

Fourth, because it saves gas over the long run. Backing and filling burns more gas than simply pulling straight out and driving away.

And fifth: if your habit is to drive through the marked spaces so as to park facing outward, you usually have to park a distance from the store to find two empty parking spaces adjacent to each other, nose-to-nose. This forces you to get some exercise. Even a few extra steps will add a little more exercise, which adds up over time.

Little things matter.